Dear Media ...

Dear Media,

You make me want to be thin. You make me want to puke in the toilet everything I've eaten today because I hear that voice in my head (or my ear - depending on how you view it) telling me it was wrong to swallow.

You make me want to break with hunger, to feel my insides creaking as they die. You make me want to measure myself and glisten like gold when I'm finally the perfect shape.

But Lihua? The real Lihua wants to feel strong. She wants muscles and the full round face with which she was born. She wants color and fun. She wants life flowing from her hands and her voice.

It's a battle, Media. Sometimes I think you're winning and then I remind myself of who I am: a writer, a thinker, a sister, a daughter, a survivor.

Sincerely,

Lihua